Beautiful Little Fool
H&M jacket // Maggie Jeans top c/o // thrifted skirt // Guess heels // Dharma Eyewear sunglasses c/o
They say your past tells a lot about you. Where you've been defines who you are. We are all slightly flawed and subtly burdened by the misdemeanors of a broken past--perpetually scarred, evidently bruise--and on most days, it's simply another awkward birthmark we've grown to accept and love. But there comes a point in time when you feel the past's weight a little heavier than usual. When yesteryear's regrets and last week's mistakes feel like chains latched onto you far too tightly. And all you hope for is the world to empty its vessels of negativity so you can paddle on with a fresher start.
My favorite quote is by F. Scott Fitzgerald from the novel,
The Great Gatsby
. Daisy casually catches up with an old lover, Nick, and as she is staring off into the city abyss before her, she quietly slips out "I hope she'll be a fool--that's the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool." When I read this, I thought it was the most beautiful thing I've read. The words struck a chord with me and since then, I dubbed it my favorite quote. It wasn't until people continuously asked me why it was, that I really considered my strong attachment to it. I thought about the way my past has influenced me to grow into the person I am today, for better or for worse, on bad days and good. With another year passed and a number added to my age, my outlook on the world grew pessimistically. I no longer saw things as colorful as my innocent childhood days and my past experiences drew a dark, thick line outlining my perception to a clearly structured ideology, stubborn and fixed. I thought about how sometimes I wish I was a fool, naively accepting oblivion so the world was easier to live in. That maybe it wasn't all too bad feeling sheltered from despair only for a brief moment to remind myself that the pessimism was surface-deep, and nothing further. I'll be a fool if it means reliving my innocent days. I'll be a fool once in a while, fundamentally and presumably.
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