Lumière
"You see: light escapes from a body at night and in the morning, despite the oppressive vacancy of her leaving’s shadow, light comes up over the mountains and it is and it is and it is."
Zara leather jacket // Mango blazer //
top c/o // DailyLook pants c/o // Windsor Store heels //
c/o
When all you know is darkness, you believe that the extent of light emerges from the contrasting tones of playful shadows. You grow up accustomed to the warmth of dark colors and admire the uninterrupted status of black--its solid bearing creeping amongst mundane beings, unequivocal and unperturbed. How fascinating to lay unexposed, feeling secure in the cracks of shadow's embrace while preparing for ascending treachery.
It was only later that I learned of the clever deception by our human bodies. When I was 9 years old, I learned that our eyes could adjust to the dark after being afraid of sleeping in pitch black for quite some time. In 9th grade, I learned the mechanics of the human eye with its cones and rods and light perception. On my 22nd birthday, I learned that I had been fooled. For 21 years prior, I was living in the dark and it was a comfortable normal for me. But day by day, I was finding brighter shades of black to the point where I learned there was an opposing entity to my deep tonal spectrum. I became aware of the fact that light was brave and brooded bold courage. Its bare ability to expose all facets in piercing radiance, unafraid and unshielded. It was light that peered through the shadows, laying subtle in gray hues and consolingly offered a way out. Black was hiding in the disguise of stability. I had once admired its dramatic solidarity, so substantial in its overcoming presence, idolizing its firm intimidation. But when I discovered an incandescent substitute, I pitied the normal I thought I knew. I grew mentally inspired by a light that represented illuminated growth, that assured fruitful adaptation and reflective change, that shed incumbent clarity when I felt my only option was to hide. Eventually, it was almost habitual, and I was far more proud of myself for finding my own light during a time of accustomed darkness than constantly retreating to what was mentally afflicting.
Because it's easy to love black but it takes courage to believe in luminance and sometimes you become so used to the dark, you forget about the light. If all it takes is a warm cup of coffee or a good-gutted laugh, I'll always find my light.
(This was also the inspiration behind my first
.)
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Photography by KMTBPhotography